Where we are... where I am

Eight days since my last post. The craziest part is that I have logged in - every single day for the last eight days - to write a post. But nothing comes. It is one of the hardest things for a blogger to be bound by what they can and can not currently write about... especially when I find writing so cathartic to begin with. And every single day all these things are happening that make me sit back and say that's a blog post right there... except that right now? It can't be. And it is slowly killing me.

Monday night I was supposed to be at Gracie's with the girls for their open house, but at the last moment I had to make another trip to Boston. Not at all complaining, I not so secretly love every minute of it. But I could certainly use the girl time right about now.

This morning I told myself I would get something written. I took the Big Guy to school and put the twins in the truck with some crayons and coloring books. Taking a ride I told them. Grabbed an iced coffee at Dunkin. If I didn't have so much to do at home I would have driven the boys straight to the beach, but instead I settled for my favorite local drive. Scituate Ave - by my dream house, the farms, the other home we almost purchased once, and the Scituate Reservoir. For some reason, it always calms me.

Somehow the boys knew that I needed it too, because they were more than agreeable to take the ride. They even let me sing the entire time. That is huge. They didn't even complain when I stopped along side the water at the reservoir. They told me how much they loved watching the water too.

When it was time to make our way back, we again drove by the farms ... stopping to see the cows in the snow. How is that for the first day of spring in New England for you.

We headed back past my dream house, the trees, the windy roads, then back to our home. And I sat down with my laptop in the dining room to write.

If I am quiet lately, please know that I am not being anti social. I have so so much to say. Big things are happening. And while I may be stressed as hell, I also know that right now, we are blessed beyond belief. I am bound by what I can and can not say here right now - by what I can Facebook and even tweet at this time ... hopefully in the future that will all change, but right now it is what it is. And if you see me, yes I can talk about some of it in person. Sorry to be cryptic here, but I feel like I have to say something to explain my silence lately. And in the meantime, I will try and find other things that I can put here... because the last thing I want to do is stop writing.